Friday, December 22, 2023

2023 Motorsports Christmas List

What better way to close a week than with a holiday on the other side? Christmas is here, and for the next few days we get to spend the time with our families, doing the minor things that make memories for lifetimes. 

While we sip hot chocolate and eggnog, and watch Christmas movies, we all know what will come in a few days, with presents under the tree. We all want something. It doesn't have to be major. The best gift could be the most practical gift, the thing that makes your life a little easier. 

The same goes for those in the motorsports world, and it our yearly tradition to give those faces and places something that would truly appreciate this Christmas. 

Shall we...?

To Álex Palou: Contractual peace.

To Sergio Pérez: A soft landing. 

To Fernando Alonso: A teammate that can score at least 60% of his points total.

To Charles Leclerc: Winning a race from pole position.

To Valtteri Bottas: People stop making the same jokes. It is old, folks. Move on.

To Shane van Gisbergen: Avoid all accidents at Daytona, Talladega and Atlanta.

To every NASCAR broadcaster: Pronunciation lessons.

To Scott McLaughlin: A NASCAR Cup car for all the non-conflict road course races. If van Gisbergen can win on debut, what could McLaughlin do?

To Callum Ilott: A ride in the 11 IndyCar weekends that do not conflict with the FIA World Endurance Championship. 

To Matthew Brabham: Driving in the five IndyCar weekends Ilott cannot race in as well as an Indianapolis 500 entry. 

To Patricio O'Ward: Someone to listen to his concerns.

To Josef Newgarden: Better pace on street courses. 

To Graham Rahal: A race at the Indianapolis Motor Speedway road course where he has the strategy advantage over Scott Dixon.

To Sébastien Bourdais: A flawless day in his hometown in June.

To the Milwaukee Mile IndyCar Event: 35,000 attendees each race day. 

To Chase Elliott: A new winter hobby. 

To Honda: Better return on investment for its IndyCar program. 

To Meyer Shank Racing: A customer GTP program. Any manufacturer it likes. 

To Wayne Taylor Racing: A Petit Le Mans where nothing goes wrong.

To Romain Grosjean: A better grip on the steering wheel at street races. 

To the World Endurance Championship: A better television deal in the United States, or MotorTrend just showing the races in their entirety on its cable channel. What are we doing here? 

To MotoGP: A race at Barber Motorsports Park... it will be on here every year until it happens

To World Superbike: Races on more continents... speaking of it, why hasn't World Superbike raced in Japan in the last 20 years? 

To Eli Tomac: A clean bill health for the entire year.

To Dale Coyne: A proper partner who can run his race team while he keeps his name on the door and remains as a strategist. You know what? Justin Marks. Dale Coyne's gift is Justin Marks. 

To NASCAR: A weekend in Montreal. 

To Kyle Kirkwood: A handful of top five finishes.

To Nick Tandy: A race in Trackhouse's Project 91 effort.

To Nick Cassidy: A GT3 program to fill his downtime between Formula E races. 

To Nico Hülkenberg: The improbable... a Formula One podium finish.

To Logan Sargeant: Results good enough that everyone stops making jokes.

To Lusail International Circuit: Better curbing.

To New Zealand: A Formula E doubleheader. It more than deserves it.

To António Félix da Costa: A few sports car races once the Formula E season is over.

To Deutsche Tourenwagen Masters: A return to Brands Hatch.

To Raffaele Marciello: Turning some heads in the BMW M Hybrid V8.

To Colton Herta: Respectable results.

To Will Power: An easier year, at and away from the racetrack.

To Simon Pagenaud: Medical clearance to return to a race car. 

To Takuma Sato: A full season in Super Formula.

To J.R. Hildebrand: A decision-making role within IndyCar.

To Jorge Martín: Suitable tires in every race.

To Marc Márquez: Career rejuvenation.

To Álex Márquez: A memorable race between him and his brother.

To Enea Bastianini: Job security.

To all the Japanese manufacturers in MotoGP: A return to their highest levels.

To the Race of Champions: A return to a proper stadium event that generates big interest.

To Corey Heim: A contactless Truck Series season finale.

To Louis Foster: Fewer retirements. 

To Sheldon Creed: Getting even. 

To A.J. Allmendinger: A season for the ages.

To Mazda MX-5 Cup: Rounds at Watkins Glen and Road America. Seriously, how is neither track on the 2024 schedule?

To Ryan Blaney: A better summer. 

To Conor Daly: A Daytona 500 attempt that isn't a complete mess. 

To the Brickyard 400: A healthy crowd.

To Indianapolis Raceway Park: NASCAR's second division moving back there. 

To Tony Stewart: Remaining on the ground in his rookie Top Fuel season.

To Chicago: Clear skies for the first ten days of July. 

To Dane Cameron: Picking up where he left off in IMSA.

To Robert Wickens: Development of hand controls to allow him a proper IndyCar test at Indianapolis.

To Kyle Larson: Two weeks of solitude with his family. No racing. No one calling him. No one mentioning his name. He gets enough attention as it is. 

To Marcus Ericsson: That same top ten finishing percentage carrying over from Chip Ganassi Racing.

To Fabio Quartararo: A decoy that can run 50% of the sprint races for him but no one knows it isn't Quartararo on the bike.

To Austin Cindric: A year without bringing up his father in context to his employment.

To Tony Kanaan: Hassle-free travel.

To Alexander Rossi: Multi-color Christmas tree lights.

To Max Verstappen and Fernando Alonso: A Hypercar or LMDh car of their choosing. 

To Marcus Armstrong: A full set of Le Creuset cookware.

To Christian Lundgaard: Rahal Letterman Lanigan Racing establishing itself as an IndyCar contender and a place he can build his career.

To Dale Earnhardt, Jr.: A year where his drivers never take each other out of a race.

To the World Rally Championship: A host of heroes. It feels like WRC is lacking those respected names that once filled the championship. 

To Denny Hamlin: Podcast comments that do not carry championship consequences.

To Bubba Wallace: A caution in his favor at a 1.5-mile oval. 

To Martin Truex, Jr.: A complete season.

To Ryan Truex: A full-time ride with Joe Gibbs Racing in NASCAR's second division.

To Ben Rhodes: A full-time chance in NASCAR's second division.

To Layne Riggs: A Cup team signing him to a development contract and committing to it. 

To Rinus VeeKay: Another team believing in his ability.

To Jack Harvey: A second chance in IndyCar.

To Stefan Wilson: A drama-free month of May.

To Álvaro Bautista: A bigger trophy case.

To Toprak Razgatlioglu: BMW getting it right.

To Jonathan Rea: One more taste at glory.

To every other World Superbike ride: A chance at being competitive.

To Andrea Kimi Antonelli: Not winning the Formula Two championship at 18 years old and forcing him into a weird spot where he can no longer race in Formula One's ladder system and forces Mercedes to find somewhere else to race for a year or two before he is actually ready for Formula One.

To Alex Albon: Catching the eye of a bigger team... or Williams having at least an early-2000s renaissance. Either or, the second one sounds better. 

To Lando Norris: A race where he is within five seconds of a Red Bull that has a track limits penalty being applied at the checkered flag.

To Liam Lawson: A team that properly acknowledges his talent. 

To Linus Lundqvist: A rookie season that validates Chip Ganassi's decision to hire him. 

To Pierre Gasly, Esteban Ocon and Théo Pourchaire: A Le Mans entry with an Alpine A424.

To Carlos Sainz, Jr.: Avoiding all drainage covers.

To Ed Carpenter: Acceptance he should only run the Indianapolis 500.

To Hélio Castroneves: Eight more starts along with his Indianapolis 500 appearance to get him to 400 IndyCar starts. 

To Christian Rasmussen: A full IndyCar season like he deserves.

To Tom Blomqvist: Some of that Formula Three magic.

To George Russell: Less reasons to speak over the radio.

To Nyck de Vries: Multiple victores in Formula E and the World Endurance Championship.

To Jake Dennis: A few IndyCar outings with Andretti Global.

To Andretti Global: Everyone remembering the team is now called Andretti Global. 

To Sam Bird: A championship push in Formula E.

To the Las Vegas Grand Prix: A 6:00 p.m. local start. Let's be realistic.

To Circuito de Jerez: The Spanish Grand Prix. It cannot be much worse than Barcelona and is a better option than Madrid.

To Formula One fans based in Europe: Understanding that one race is going to start at 3:00 a.m. Central Europe Time. 

To Lewis Hamilton: Sidepods. 

To Jack Doohan: Something to occupy him at the back of the garage... a yo-yo, perhaps. 

To Frederik Vesti: I guess an IndyCar ride... there is nowhere for these Formula Two drivers to go. 

To every Formula Two driver: Two more Formula One teams because there are not enough spots.

To the existing ten Formula One teams: Money... because it is the only thing that can shut them up. 

To Daniel Ricciardo: A return to the lovely person he was circa 2016.

To Kevin Magnussen: A Cadillac V-Series.R.

To Pirelli: Tires it is confident it can introduce to Formula One that do not require tire blankets.

To Yuki Tsunoda: Another race leading laps. 

To James Calado: Autosport British Competition Driver of the Year because he won the 24 Hours of Le Mans he was the only nominee to win anything. 

To Francesco Bagnaia: Some better sprint race results.

To Marco Bezzecchi: Ice packs.

To Brad Binder: A home race at Kyalami. 

To Franco Morbidelli: The bounce back year he has been waiting for. 

To Joey Logano: Fans appreciating NASCAR drivers more. 

To Alex Quinn: A full-time entry in Indy Lights.

To Myles Rowe: Force Indy support for at least two seasons beyond 2024 if he doesn't immediately break into IndyCar.

To Kyffin Simpson: Towels.

To Kamui Kobayashi: A Super Formula victory.

To Filipe Albuquerque: A commitment that Honda will take him to Le Mans.

To Mick Schumacher: An impressive year in Hypercar. 

To A.J. Foyt Racing: Indianapolis-esque speed everywhere else.

To Santino Ferrucci: Another full season in IndYCar

To Juncos Hollinger Racing: The ability to say the right thing in response to bad behavior.

To Oscar Piastri: Avoiding a sophomore slump.

To Guanyu Zhou: A phenomenal first home race.

To Pedro Acosta: Realistic expectations from everyone else.

To Álex Rins: A Jacuzzi. 

To Aprilia: A little more speed everywhere. Not a lot. Just a little bit. 

To Maverick Viñales: A grand prix where he is in the battle for the lead late. 

To Aleix Espargaró: A hibachi set.

To Lance Stroll: A seat in Aston Martin's Valkyrie program starting in 2025.

To David Malukas: Not being burnt out after a year at McLaren.

To Agustín Canapino: Averaging a top 20 finish in IndyCar.

To Kevin Harvick: Broadcast booth partners that are up to his level.

To William Byron: Keeping up the results.

To Alex Bowman: A year's worth of dog food. 

To Ben Keating: A 24 Hours of Le Mans entry in the Hypercar class.

To Pipo Derani: Some quality sunglasses. 

To Risi Competizione: Enough funding to return to full-time IMSA competition. 

To DragonSpeed: Another shot at IndyCar since it is no longer getting the sports car entries.

To Ryan Newman: A full season in the NASCAR modified series.

To Superstar Racing Experience: Realizing it doesn't need dirt races. 

To the NASCAR Truck Series: Its playoffs not taking two-and-a-half months to complete, and its season finale starting a practical hour. Move the finale to Saturday afternoon with the finale for NASCAR's second division taking place Saturday evening at Phoenix. Makes sense.

To Chase Sexton: Remaining on the bike.

To Jett Lawrence: Another dazzling season.

To Jack Miller: Fewer races getting away from him.

To Takaaki Nakagami: A podium finish. It could be any of the three positions. 

To Phillip Island: Weather that allows a sprint race and a grand prix to take place.

To Felix Rosenqvist: Staying out of the marbles at Indianapolis. 

To Pietro Fittipaldi: Haas wishing it gave him a proper shot at Formula One.

To Jak Crawford: Haas supporting him as a development driver. Come on, Haas! He is right there.

To Christopher Bell: No brake failures.

To Carson Hocevar: Some proper sense.

To Matt Crafton: Anger management.

To Chris Buescher: A pogo stick.

To Jordan Taylor: More aggression for his next NASCAR start.

To Parker Kligerman: Not overdriving the car with a chance to win a race.

To Brad Keselowski: Some good nights of sleep.

To Tyler Reddick: Cozy pair of socks.

To Kalle Rovanperä: A fun year experimenting in other forms of motorsports. 

To Oliver Askew: A full-time ride somewhere. He is a good commentator, but he is too young to be a commentator. 

To the sports car world: Splitting the Asian Le Mans Series into the Middle East Le Mans Series and the Pacific Le Mans Series. Four rounds in the Middle East. Four to five races over the Pacific countries (Japan, China, Thailand, Malaysia, Australia).

To Super GT: Somewhere easy for people to watch the races live around the world.

To Supercars: Same as Super GT.

To GT World Challenge America: Returning to how the fun the series was as Pirelli World Challenge from 2014-2018. It is ok to run with IndyCar. Those were great weekends.

To Indianapolis Motor Speedway: No construction delays on the Hall of Fame and Museum renovations.

Also to Indianapolis Motor Speedway: Higher catchfences. 

To IndyCar's Nashville weekend: No hiccups and no interruptions to the on-track activities.

To Watkins Glen and Richmond: Flipping NASCAR Cup races. It makes zero sense that Watkins Glen is in September after being in August forever and Richmond is in August when it was in September for the longest time. Quick swap.

To North Wilkesboro: One of Atlanta's Cup weekends. 

To Daytona: The second NASCAR weekend returning to July 4th. 

To Atlanta: It's one Cup weekend being the regular season finale. 

To Sonoma: Moving its Cup weekend to the start of the season with the other western races. It makes no sense for there to be one trip to California between races outside St. Louis and in Iowa. 

To NASCAR fans: Amazon Prime subscriptions. You are going to love it. 

To the state of Texas: The NASCAR weekend at Texas Motor Speedwaynot conflicting with any international series taking place at Circuit of the Americas. How does this keep happening?

To Pocono Raceway: An IndyCar-NASCAR doubleheader. 500-mile IndyCar race on Saturday afternoon, 400-mile Cup race on Sunday afternoon. $2 million prize if anyone can win both. $1 million prize if anyone can finish in the top five in both. $500,000 prize if anyone can finish in the top ten in both. 

To Zandvoort: Another rain shower during the Dutch Grand Prix.

To Imola: Clear weather for its grand prix weekend. 

To the Canadian Grand Prix: A sprint weekend. It actually makes sense if you think about it. 

To Sauber: People just calling it Sauber and not overthinking it. 

To Richie Stanaway: A return season for the ages.

To Felipe Massa: Accepting he did not win the world championship in 2008.

To Jack Hawksworth and Ben Barnicoat: Toyota giving them a Toyota GR010 Hybrid for the 24 Hours of Le Mans. Third driver of their choosing. 

To Sebastian Vettel: Returning to racing whenever he is ready.

To Scott Dixon: Quality time with the family.

To Lime Rock Park: An IMSA round. There is literally a month off in from the middle of August to the middle of September. There is your window. 

To Devlin DeFrancesco: Completing a fifth-to-first pass at the start of a race and then not falling off the face of the planet.

To Winward Racing: Avoiding all incidents in the build up to the 24 Hours of Daytona.

To IndyCar: Geez... where to start? How about settling on a definitive date for a new chassis and engine regulations?

To the IndyCar fanbase: Chilling out. Dial it back by about 90%. It's not the end of the world. 

Of course, I wish everyone a Merry Christmas and happy holidays. The years start going a little quicker, but that does not mean they are any less enjoyable. Remember to savor this time with loved ones. I hope every stays safe and healthy. 

Peace and love to all!